NostalGeoff

This episode was a mixed bag of good, bad, and gross. Typical.

I was right!

Last week I threw out a theory that Montana was Brooke’s former fiancée’s sister. And it turned out to be true! Not so random after all. We find out that Montana met Richard Ramirez while she was teaching a Midnight Manrobics (an actual thing) class. He revealed his crazy colors when he killed a class member who disagreed with Montana’s music choice. Don’t mess with Billy Idol. She enlisted Ramirez in killing Brooke, in order to avenge her brother. Unfortunately for them, Brooke kept evading death. Dumb luck.

That’s disgusting

Xavier arrives at the dining hall to warn Chef Bertie about Jingles. Unfortunately, the camp killer shows up before they can escape. Xavier hides while a calm, yet freaked out, Bertie engages Jingles. She even makes his favorite PBJ sandwich, just like when they were coworkers at the camp. Stupid Xavier makes a noise and is discovered by Jingles. Bertie tries to help and is beaten down with a mallet. Then Jingles tosses Xavier in the oven and locks him in. We have to watch him melt under the heat and it’s as gross as it sounds. Luckily, Bertie is able to get him out. But, she’s near death from Jingles’ beating. She makes Xavier stab her in the heart to end her suffering. Poor Bertie. Xavier is horrified when he sees his reflection. That oven did a number on him. Later, when he runs into Jingles he hopes for death, but the killer spares him. I don’t know if that’s a good or bad thing.

The real killer

The truth about Jingles came out when he comes after Margaret. She fills him in on what actually happened back in 1970. It turns out, she tried to get Jingles to murder the other counselors who were bullying her. What’s with these women asking for murderous favors. When Jingles didn’t come thru, psycho Margaret took matters into her own hands and went on a gleeful killing spree. Then she framed Jingles for the crimes. He proclaimed his innocence, but was hauled off to the asylum anyways. Then he was given electroshock therapy that wiped his memory. So, when everyone told him he killed half the camp, he believed them. Back in the present, Jingles is floored by this revelation. When he tries to kill Margaret (again) she shoots him three times. She assumes he’s dead, but then he disappears when her back is turned. Doesn’t anyone check for a pulse? Later, Trevor shows up and Margaret stabs him to death. She intends to frame Jingles again. She tosses Trevor’s body in a car (the last working vehicle and way out of this hell hole) and lights it on fire. She claims God has given her the power to accept her true killer self. I knew this bitch was crazy, but I didn’t realize how crazy.

Caught between two killers

After escaping the shack where Donna was keeping her captive, Brooke falls into a trap set by the nutty psychologist. Donna explains how she broke Jingles out of the asylum so she could study him and now Brooke is her lab rat. Donna hides and waits for the killer to arrive. But Ramirez (tipped off by Montana) shows up instead. Before he can kill Brooke, Jingles arrives. It’s a serial killer showdown. Almost as entertaining as Freddy vs. Jason. Jingles triumphs when he impales Ramirez on a tree branch, headfirst. Eww. Meanwhile, Montana discovers Donna and they get into a Dynasty-style catfight. It would have been better in a lily pond. Montana knocks the psychologist out and takes off. Donna wakes up in time see Richard being magically resurrected. I’m guessing this is Satan’s work. After this week’s reveals, it doesn’t sound so farfetched.